June 26, 2013

Conversations with K-girls: A Carless Mistake

K-girl who I just met: May I see your car?

Me (reaching for my wallet): Of course, you can see my card. Here you go.

K-girl: No, not your card! May I see your CAR?

Me: Oh...

June 15, 2013

One Chance

Me: I hope she will give me a second chance.

Korean lady: Second chance? When did you got a first chance?

Me: Oh, good point... I hope she will give me a first chance.

June 03, 2013

Mad for Garlic... and Deodorant

Korean guy: Do you know why Korean girls don't like you? It's not just because you are Indian blood. It's also your bad smell.

Me: My bad smell? OK…

Korean guy: Western people think Koreans are stinky because they smell like garlic, no? But that is a normal thing here, so it is not a bad or weird.

Me: So I smell bad?

Korean guy: Yes. How many times do you use deodorant?

Me: Usually one time in the morning.

Korean guy: That's not enough. That's why you smell bad.

Me: What!? You expect me to apply it every four hours or something?

Korean guy: No, that's still not enough. You must use it every hour or two.

Me: That's too much.

Korean guy: No, you can't say that. That is normal thing here so you must do it.

*****

On an interesting side note, the 'flower men' of South Korea make up less than 1% of the global male population yet account for over 20% of male cosmetic sales worldwide.

May 31, 2013

Conversations with K-girls: Dinner Plans

K-girl: I have a dinner plan.

Me: With me?

K-girl: No.... uh.... umm..... with my family?

May 28, 2013

In Hostile Territory

Me: She looks a little Chinese, even though she is Korean.

Korean guy: Yes, so I don't like her.

Me: Chinese girls are also nice.

Korean guy: Japanese better but they exposed to radioactivity.

Me: I thought you had a Chinese girlfriend before.

Korean guy: Nope, I just had Chinese homemate but she had stinky foreign boyfriend.

Me: A big hairy oaf?

Korean guy: Oaf?

Me: For example "That was my foot you just stepped on, you bumbling oaf".

Korean guy (after looking up the definition of oaf in an electronic dictionary): "Why give publicity to this self-indulgent, adolescent oaf?"

Me: Yes, exactly. For instance, that guy talking to the Chinese-looking girl appears to be an oaf.

Korean guy: That I agree. He looks oaf so normal girls don't have any hostility.

Me: Yup, they let their defences down but when they see a dangerous Prince of Persia they have their shields up.

Korean guy: Yes, that's fact so it's not your fault. Their reaction is natural.

Me: Hostility is a good word.

Korean guy: Why? It's bad word, isn't it?

Me: I mean it's a good word to describe the situation.

Korean guy: Aha~