Thirty Years A Hunk

I suffered a terrible bout of adult chicken pox, leaving my previously unblemished skin tarnished. Once I was no longer contagious I returned to work.

Coworker: How's your chicken pox? All recovered?

Me: There are scars and holes all over my face. It's horrible. I had smooth skin for 30 years.

Coworker: I hadn't noticed all the scars till you mentioned them.

Me: I noticed the scars.

Coworker: But honey... you're vain.

A Goodly Woman for a Goodly Man

I received an interesting email today:

Hey. My name is Ekaterina :) I'm from Kirghizia and very goodly woman! and I'm trying to find goodly Man ;) If You are interested ;) reply me ;) I can send You my photo attached, good bye)

Unluckily for her, this goodly man has already found his goodly woman.