September 11, 2012

Korean Age


Koreans calculate their age in a unique way. A baby begins life as a one year old, receiving credit for the time spent in the mother's womb. According to the custom, when a new year begins everyone becomes another year older. If we are following the solar calendar, a baby born on December 31 would be one year old on New Year's Eve and two years old on New Year's Day despite being an individual entity for only 48 hours or so.
 
*****
 
"A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age." ~ Robert Frost

September 08, 2012

Blood and Soil

For a man who embodies the very best of the East and West, the answer to the simplest of questions can lead to much confusion. Most Korean and Chinese people will not believe I am from Canada. My passport and birth certificate will not suffice as proof, even if accompanied by a note from the Canadian embassy. They will rest easy only after I expand upon my origin story and tell them of my Indian roots. All preconceived notions that they have about dark skinned people are then immediately applied to me.

Korean man: Where you come from?
Me: Canada.
Korean man: Really? But judging your accent, you are Arabic?
Me: No, you mean judging from my appearance.
Korean man: Oh... sorry.

The Latin terms jus sanguinis (right of blood) and jus soli (right of soil) describe two alternate approaches to determining nationality. The former refers to citizenship being determined based on the nationality of the newborn child's parents. In the latter case, citizenship is granted based on the physical location of where the child was born.

When a Korean or Chinese asks the "Where you from?" question to an exotic being, what they are interested in is the blood and not the soil. What I hear is "Which country were you born in?". What they are actually asking is "What is your ethnic background?" or "Where do your ancestors come from?". These are perfectly legitimate questions, although white guys are never asked if they are really Scottish, English, French, Italian, or Russian if they say they are from Canada or America.
*****

All good people agree,
  And all good people say,
All nice people, like Us, are We
  And every one else is They:
But if you cross over the sea,
  Instead of over the way,
You may end by (think of it!) looking on We
  As only a sort of They!

~ "We and They" by Rudyard Kipling

September 03, 2012

Girls Generation

It took South Korea only three decades to transform from a recipient of foreign aid to a donor nation, making it the first and till date only country to achieve this remarkable feat. The economy was not the only thing to transform during this time span. When looking at older women or historical archives, and then comparing their looks to the current generation of young Korean ladies the difference is night and day.


The visual discrepancy between the past and current generation may be explained by several factors. Whether through an improvement in general nutrition and standard of living, the availability of affordable surgical procedures, or generous helpings of makeup, the results are truly startling. Throughout history the Korean men have consistently maintained their gauche looks, so the transition from ogre to ogled is unique to the Korean female.


The average Korean man sports the appearance of someone who has been repeatedly victimized, first by being bludgeoned with a baseball bat to the face and then via several comprehensive sessions of electrolysis. Their aesthetic deficit is completely forgiven by the modern Korean ladies, who cling to them like security blankets. To their credit, the Korean guys are well mannered, hygienic, fashion conscious, and surprisingly well built, perhaps due to the years spent performing mandatory military service.

*****

"Normal alien can't dicriminate which Korean girl is more beautiful. They like ugly or normal k-girl, but you know which is better." - the ultimate compliment given to me by a Korean man

August 21, 2012

DMZ


The northeastern-most point of the demilitarized zone (DMZ) between South and North Korea is about 50 kilometers from the beach town of Sokcho. Of course, calling the world's most heavily fortified border demilitarized is like calling the many hours that Koreans spend in the office productive. I was accompanied by Adrian, an avid rock climber, to the Goseong Unification Observatory.


There was no simple way to reach the viewpoint near the border without an automobile. After taking a succession of buses, each stopping at its terminal and telling us that no buses would go any further, we were given a ride to the DMZ by a friendly mixed race couple. The man was Chinese and the lady was Korean, a rare combination in the land of racial purity and ethnic hierarchy.


We had to climb a hill to reach the viewpoint, passing the cleverly labelled "Last Restroom" on the way  up to the summit. I was able to glimpse North Korea for the second time, with the first being from atop the Great Wall in the Chinese border outpost of Dandong. I used the telescope to get a closer look but could not see much apart from a few foot soldiers and some supply trucks. The scenery was a blend of green hills, sandy beaches, blue skies, turquoise waves, and barbed wire. Chain link fencing on the coastline was an eyesore, but an integral part of the security measures taken by both sides to prevent hostiles from intruding into their lands.


We stopped by at the recently constructed DMZ Museum before heading back. A chronology of the various events that led to the current situation was explained in layman's terms, culminating with a message of peace and hope for a shared future. The couple lived in Sokcho, so they offered us a ride all the way there. We treated them to lunch at a seaside restaurant, and then dozed off in the back of the car as it made its way back to town.


*****

"You have to be able to risk your identity for a bigger future than the present you are living." – Fernando Flores

August 19, 2012

Kuala Lumpur


After enjoying my first taste of Malaysia in Penang, I made my way to Kuala Lumpur. The delicious food, multi ethnic population, tropical climate, and solid transportation system make Kuala Lumpur a very livable city, but not a particularly exciting one. KL is interesting compared to the island sized shopping mall that is neighbouring Singapore, but nowhere near as fascinating as the Beijings and Bombays of the world in terms of tourist attractions, history, or atmosphere. Nor does it boast the exquisitely crafted beauties of the world's plastic surgery capital, Seoul.


A relatively new city, Kuala Lumpur began its life in the mid nineteenth century as a tin mining outpost. The iconic Petronas Twin Towers are the most eye catching of KL's landmarks, with its design based on traditional Islamic geometric patterns. Once the world's tallest structure, it now sits at fifth place in the ever changing rankings. They remain the tallest twin towers ever constructed. An upmarket shopping complex, movie theatre, art gallery, and beautifully landscaped gardens are all a part of the grounds.


In the old part of town, Chinatown, Little India, and colonial buildings can be explored on foot. Merdeka Square, where the flag of Malaysia was first hoisted after it became an independent nation, is a nice place to relax in between. To escape the heat I dropped into the free and air conditioned Textile Museum. The staff seemed surprised to see a visitor. 


At Masjid Jamek, I followed the example of those entering before me and respectfully donned a blue graduation type gown before going in. Men slumbered peacefully in the shade provided by the hundred year old mosque's pavilions. As I perspired, I realized that the gowns were only meant to cover up guys in shorts or ladies that were skimpily dressed.


During my remaining time in Kuala Lumpur, I wandered around the shopping areas of Bukit Bintang, stopped outside the King's Palace, and ate hairy crab with my former Beijing roommate and a Malaysian siren. At the Central Market, I went to a fish spa where the sea critters enthusiastically nibbled away on my dead skin.


*****

"The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page." – St. Augustine