Vancouver Nightlife: Clubbing with Cheapskates

My long awaited introduction to Vancouver's clubbing scene took place on a steamy summer's night. It was a Friday, so I was already downtown for work. As it takes a minimal amount of effort (if any) for me to look like a heartthrob, I had come prepared in the morning so I would not have to return home after work to change into something presentable. Sporting a dark blazer with a tight gray shirt underneath, slim fit jeans, polished shoes, and a couple of days worth of stubble, I was a morale booster in the office and a traffic stopper on the streets.

On Davie St. there were no automobiles present and a critical mass of cyclists passed through hoping to catch a glimpse of the Indo-Canadian Temptation. Since the clubbing scene does not start coalescing until near midnight, I had quite a few hours from the time I stopped working to the time I would begin clubbing. My friends who were supposed to accompany me had not made any dinner plans. Repeated suggestions were ignored and inquiries were left unanswered, so I had proceeded to have dinner with another friend at Kadoya, maker of specialty sushi, on Davie St. Just as I was finishing up my meal, I received a phone call from the girlfriend of one of the guys who would take me clubbing. She said she would pick me up and take me to Incendio, the restaurant where the rest of the guys had already started having dinner.

After I was delivered to Incendio and offered a seat at the table, my companions enticed me to share some of their leftover pizza and wine. When the waitress appeared with the bill though, they insisted on splitting it evenly amongst everyone. I objected strenuously, as I had barely touched the food. Not only that, my friends had began eating without me, I had not been present when the food was ordered, and it was not common practice to charge money for samples. They began cursing loudly, offending the parents of young children seated at nearby tables. Several times the waitresses came by to check if they could help in any way (such as by providing a calculator). When I was offered a sample of the leftovers, I had believed it was a gracious gesture, but it was not to be. I stood my ground bravely and calmly, one man against many. Possessing much more than a modicum of decorum, I remained civil and offered to pay half of what they would pay for the meal. This offer was flatly rejected and we were at an impasse. The argument had lasted many minutes. This was my final offer. A neutral observer till now, my friend's girlfriend sprung into action and offered to pay the remaining half so that my combined portion of the total cost would match theirs. With no shame and little dignity, they accepted the offer. It had gotten quite late, so we rushed off to find a club.

----------

One of my companions suggested going to our desired club in the daytime before they began to start charging an entrance fee, getting a stamp on our hands as proof, and then returning again later at night.

Anish, an expert in the field, responded: "I suggest you regale the ladies with your strategy to get in free. Women love frugal men."

Cirque du Soleil - Corteo

Cirque du Soleil, the grandest circus act on Earth, was in town. I went to check out a show under the big top with some friends. After enjoying dinner for too long at Moxies, we rushed to the circus grounds. We were ushered into our seats inside the Grand Chapiteau just as the grandmaster was instructing everyone not to take any pictures and to turn off their phones. The large yellow and blue tent had been set up on the site of the former Vancouver Indy racing circuit in Vancouver near Science World. The flags of each country from which a Cirque performer originated in adorned the exterior, while the dimly lit interior featured a movable central stage with bleachers full of spectators on all sides. I was seated behind one of the poles that the performers used to climb to the top before indulging in daring high wire acts of whimsical fancy, but was quite close to the stage.

This particular show was called Corteo - a "celebratory procession" of a clown's funeral. The deceased clown, accompanied by angels, watches the proceedings from high above. The first and longer half of the show before the intermission was spectacular, with near perfect synchronization among the performers. A phenomenal degree of skill, dexterity, and strength was demonstrated while performers bounced from beds on rotating platforms, or spun themselves around in Cyr wheels. The second half was more toned down, featuring traditional circus items such as the trapeze. There was some interaction with the audience when a smaller-sized person (midget) attached to a hot air balloon came along and then was guided in different directions by enthusiastic pushes from members of the crowd. The two and a half hour long spectacle put on by the Circus of the Sun did not disappoint.

Taste of the City

The 6th annual Taste of the City was held on the grounds of the Pacific National Exhibition (PNE) on July 19th, 2008. Top restaurants and caterers from around the Lower Mainland were selling bite sized portions of food so that the general populace could sample them. There was a great diversity among the cuisines, matching the multicultural makeup of the city. Unlike EAT! Vancouver, where there was an entrance fee and plenty of other forms of culinary entertainment available to sooth the palate, this event was free and focused on filling the belly, one morsel at a time.

Fraserfest 2008

Held at the historic Westminster Quay by the mighty Fraser River, Fraserfest is a celebration of the riverfront lifestyle. Harbour tours were being offered but I opted for a relaxing stroll from one end of the boardwalk to the other. The Burnaby Association of Marine Modelers (BAMM) had painstakingly created miniature models of boats and ships, including one of a SeaBus.

The highly entertaining live theatrical presentation of the lives of salmon - "Voices of the Fraser" - featured a stirring rendition of the song "It's Not Easy To Be A Salmon These Days". Taking place in New Westminster, Fraserfest attendees were primarily pensioners, young families, or international heartthrobs.

White Water: Rash Decision

2 hours drive to the base camp. One hour bus ride to the starting point. 5 minutes in the river until flipping the boat, being submerged underneath it, battered by rocks, and eventually pulled to safety by the guide. Part 3 of a 3 part mini series. Part 1 is here and Part 2 is here.

The guides took me on to the shore and checked my mental state. My complexion was pale, my hands were quivering, and my body was bruised, but my spirit was unbroken. I was offered the option to return to the bus and end my adventure, but my uncommon valor prevented me from accepting the offer and I chose to continue. This decision was met with a chorus of cheers from my male admirers. Tears of joy were flowing from the eyes of my female followers, and once they had been assured that I was alright, they too chose to continue the trip. We switched boats, with the most experienced guide taking over our old boat, and journeyed onward. The rest of the 2 hour plus voyage was uneventful compared to the first five minutes, with a few more close calls but no serious incidents. During a calm stretch, members of other boats took a swim in the chilly waters, but there were no volunteers from our boat. The backdrop was amazing, with glaciers and extinct volcanoes on each side of the river and tropical forests readily noticeable. I did not encounter any wildlife during the journey, apart from a mouse that crossed the street on the Sea to Sky Highway during the drive to Squamish.

After changing back into dry clothes, a hearty barbecue awaited us. The hot showers were not operational, but I had already had a cold shower. I signed an incident report that had to be filled out by our guide due to our accident. I mentioned that apart from general soreness and slight damage to my spectacles, I had a rash around my wrist. He said it was probably from friction with the wet suit. A passerby remarked that I should show him my other rash. The experience was one I would not want to repeat, but one that was worth trying once. As the tagline of the adventure company stated - "Live Stories Worth Telling".