At my Hyderabad house, not to be confused with the restaurant Hyderabad House where I partake in some delightful biryani, we employed the services of an old and rather useless maid. Her daily routine consisted of clearing out all the empty cans, glasses, and bottles she could find in the flat and then getting a refund for it. Dishes were halfheartedly washed, the floor was swept once a month, and the bathroom was ignored altogether. With heavy hearts, my roommates and I decided to terminate her employment and acquire a new maid. After heated debate, we settled on a teenager/young adult who lived in our garage. Very enthusiastic at the prospect of regular employment, the new maid regularly made us tea, folded my clothes, made my bed, etc...
As was the case with the previous one, this maid also did not speak a word of English or Hindi, knowing only Telugu. Communication occurred primarily in the form of hand gestures and facial expressions (of which I have a limited repertoire), but was largely successful. When she appeared at the doorstep decked out in her finest traditional Indian clothing on the day of the Ganesh festival and kept asking if I wanted her to sweep the floor, it was easy to determine that she was asking for a day off. The occasional misunderstanding did occur though, such as when my flatmate from Dubai could not locate his CD collection. He queried the maid for the whereabouts of his media, but the maid confused his question for an accusation of theft. For the next few days she had a sad face containing evidence of heavy tearfall. The source of her misery was deduced through masterful interpretation of linguistic nuances, and the Telugu speaking landlord was asked to speak to her and clarify the situation.
October 11, 2006
September 10, 2006
Satyam: Cyberspace
After two and a half months, the powers that be at Satyam decided that I should undergo training in Hyderabad, before being shipped off to Bangalore. Thus I made my way to Satyam Cyberspace, an office located in Hitec City in the heart of Cyberabad! Here is a brief timeline of my first day at work:
10:00 am - Arrive at workplace.
10:15 am - My reporting manager (boss) gave me detailed instructions to locate the offices of my unit (Consulting and Enterprise Solutions). Following his advice I reached a door with a sign taped on it - "Use other door".
10:20 am - Reporting manager tells me to wait in front of the door. Contact person will come to meet me.
10:50 am - No one has come to meet me.
11:05 am - Stumble upon alternate entrance. I ask for the whereabouts of the contact person I am supposed to meet. One helpful Satyamite responds "He is out for lunch. Come back in a few hours".
1:30 pm - Return to office after a refreshing buffet meal at the cafeteria. I ask for the whereabouts of the contact person I am supposed to meet. One helpful Satyamite responds "He is out for lunch. Come back in a few hours".
4:00 pm - Return to office after a refreshing sleep in the sofa located in front of the women's washroom. I ask for the whereabouts of the contact person I am supposed to meet. One helpful Satyamite responds "I'll let him know you are here". I find an empty workstation and sit in front of it.
6:00 pm - Contact person arrives and informs me that the training session has been postponed for two weeks as an empty conference room in which to give the lessons was not available during this period. I will have to train myself until that time.
6:30 pm - Leave office.
For the following two weeks I spent my time going over documentation related to Product Lifecycle Management (PLM) and the particular software I would be working with (Agile PLM).
One fine Tuesday morning, I was strolling down the street looking for an auto rickshaw to take to work. Suddenly, an unidentified flying object deposited its droppings on my shoulder. Due to the harsh climate, my excrement detection and avoidance system was malfunctioning. Without adequate warning, I was unable to react to the incoming aerial bombardment. My shirt was left with a greenish stain resembling the gravy of the mint alu (potato) found in the Satyam cafeteria lunch buffet. I had to quickly return to my abode and change garments, before continuing on my journey. Apparently, this auspicious event is a sign of good luck in several cultures.
10:00 am - Arrive at workplace.
10:15 am - My reporting manager (boss) gave me detailed instructions to locate the offices of my unit (Consulting and Enterprise Solutions). Following his advice I reached a door with a sign taped on it - "Use other door".
10:20 am - Reporting manager tells me to wait in front of the door. Contact person will come to meet me.
10:50 am - No one has come to meet me.
11:05 am - Stumble upon alternate entrance. I ask for the whereabouts of the contact person I am supposed to meet. One helpful Satyamite responds "He is out for lunch. Come back in a few hours".
1:30 pm - Return to office after a refreshing buffet meal at the cafeteria. I ask for the whereabouts of the contact person I am supposed to meet. One helpful Satyamite responds "He is out for lunch. Come back in a few hours".
4:00 pm - Return to office after a refreshing sleep in the sofa located in front of the women's washroom. I ask for the whereabouts of the contact person I am supposed to meet. One helpful Satyamite responds "I'll let him know you are here". I find an empty workstation and sit in front of it.
6:00 pm - Contact person arrives and informs me that the training session has been postponed for two weeks as an empty conference room in which to give the lessons was not available during this period. I will have to train myself until that time.
6:30 pm - Leave office.
For the following two weeks I spent my time going over documentation related to Product Lifecycle Management (PLM) and the particular software I would be working with (Agile PLM).
One fine Tuesday morning, I was strolling down the street looking for an auto rickshaw to take to work. Suddenly, an unidentified flying object deposited its droppings on my shoulder. Due to the harsh climate, my excrement detection and avoidance system was malfunctioning. Without adequate warning, I was unable to react to the incoming aerial bombardment. My shirt was left with a greenish stain resembling the gravy of the mint alu (potato) found in the Satyam cafeteria lunch buffet. I had to quickly return to my abode and change garments, before continuing on my journey. Apparently, this auspicious event is a sign of good luck in several cultures.
September 01, 2006
An Important Lesson
A French Canadian intern was confused as to why Indians used water rather than toilet paper to cleanse their cheeks and the chasm between. An intern of Punjabi descent recounted his father's explanation for this cultural phenomenon: "When someone drops some food on a table, wiping it with a paper towel is a quick fix. But to really clean the mess, washing it with water is a much more effective solution."
A Cautionary Tale
Having vacated the living room, I now share a room with a Korean guy. The other Korean chap who used to live in this room departed for greener pastures with fewer mosquitoes. My roommate has managed to befriend a fellow who is both an university student and rickshaw driver rolled into one. He also has a brother with long hair who rides a scooter. The dynamic duo invited him to their sister's wedding, and even gave him an auto ride to the wedding hall.
My flatmate from Dubai is suspicious of these individuals. He told us a cautionary tale of an intern who was once befriended by an Indian on the street. Together they went to a few clubs and parties and had a thoroughly enjoyable time. One day the Indian friend approached the intern in desperate need for money. He needed to borrow two thousand rupees immediately. He showed the intern his ring, convinced him that it was worth a fortune, and gave it to him as collateral in exchange for the money and left, never to be seen again. The next day the intern discovered his cell phone was missing and further investigation revealed that identical rings could be purchased from local street vendors for a pittance.
My flatmate from Dubai is suspicious of these individuals. He told us a cautionary tale of an intern who was once befriended by an Indian on the street. Together they went to a few clubs and parties and had a thoroughly enjoyable time. One day the Indian friend approached the intern in desperate need for money. He needed to borrow two thousand rupees immediately. He showed the intern his ring, convinced him that it was worth a fortune, and gave it to him as collateral in exchange for the money and left, never to be seen again. The next day the intern discovered his cell phone was missing and further investigation revealed that identical rings could be purchased from local street vendors for a pittance.
Rd No 3
My flat consists of two levels. The lower level consists of a spacious courtyard with adjacent rooms on two sides in an L shape. The I part of the L contains the kitchen, large bathroom, and the living room. The _ part of the L contains two bedrooms and a smaller bathroom. 2 guys live in each of these rooms. Until a fortnight ago, there were 5 men in the flat so I stayed in the living room. Now I have moved in to an actual bedroom. All ceilings on this level are covered in cobwebs, including the kitchen. The bathrooms are filthy and contain many indescribable wonders. The large bathroom contains an Indian style (crouch and relax) toilet. The smaller one has a Western style (sit and concentrate) toilet that was recently outfitted with a seat due to the generosity of the landlord. The flushing mechanism is not fully operational so buckets of water in conjunction with a bum shower (a gun shaped mini shower used to clean the rear) are utilised as an alternative method of waste disposal. The upper level consists of only one room, where two girls reside. It has no cobwebs. The bathroom within it is relatively sanitary, but I am forbidden from using it.
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